10 Tips for a Conversation with a Colleague about Mental Health

Today is Time to Talk Day, an opportunity to encourage open and supportive conversations about mental health. Many of us want to help when we see a colleague struggling, but knowing how to start the conversation—and what to say—can feel daunting.

To help you feel more confident, Deb Hempsall-Bell, Mental Health Clinical Operations Manager and experienced CBT Therapist at IPRS Health, has provided expert advice on how to approach these important conversations with care and confidence.

1. Set Time Aside

If you’re concerned about a colleague, take the time to check in with them properly. Choose a quiet, private space where you won’t be interrupted, and ensure you can give them your full attention. Avoid rushing the conversation—someone who is struggling may need time to open up.

2. Establish Your Intentions

Before starting the conversation, take a moment to reflect:

• What is the purpose of this conversation?
• What do I hope the outcome will be?
• What do I want to accomplish by having this conversation?

Having a clear sense of what you want to achieve will help guide the conversation in a meaningful and constructive way.

3. Be Mindful of Your Language

The words we choose can have a significant impact. Keep the focus on the person, not the problem, and use language that conveys support rather than judgment. Simple phrases like “I’m here for you” can be incredibly powerful.

4. Acknowledge Their Experience

Let them know you recognise that they are going through a difficult time. A simple statement such as “I can see that things have been tough for you” can validate their feelings and show that you care.

5. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Encourage them to talk by asking open-ended questions that invite reflection rather than a simple "yes" or "no" response. Keep the conversation informal, and if appropriate, share your own experiences to build trust. However, remember that this conversation is about them, so focus on listening rather than offering solutions. Listening is enough to show that you are valuing them.

6. Use Positive and Open Body Language

Non-verbal cues are just as important as the words you use. Maintain comfortable eye contact, offer reassuring nods, and keep an open posture to show that you are engaged. These small actions can help your colleague feel safe and supported.

7. Show Respect and Curiosity

Approach the conversation with genuine curiosity and respect for their perspective. You don’t need to have all the answers—sometimes, simply being present and showing that you care can make a significant difference.

8. Starting the Conversation

If you’re unsure how to begin, consider using one of these conversation starters:

• “I need your help with something can we have some time to talk about it?”
• “I would like to understand what has been happening for you and I really want to hear about your feelings and thoughts about it”
• “I think we may have different perceptions about X and I would really like to understand how you think about it?”

These open, non-judgmental approaches can help ease into the conversation naturally.

9. Closing the Conversation Thoughtfully

As you bring the conversation to a close, be mindful of what your colleague has shared. Summarise the key points discussed and confirm any agreed next steps. Show appreciation for their time and courage in opening up.

You might say:

• “Thank you for your time today. We’ve discussed X, and this is what we agreed to do moving forward…”
• “Is there anything I’ve missed or anything else you’d like to add?”
• “Would you like to discuss anything else? Are there any other questions?”
• “I really appreciate you trusting me with this. Please take care of yourself.”

Acknowledging their openness and ensuring they feel heard helps end the conversation in a supportive and respectful way.

10. Look After Yourself Too

Supporting others can be emotionally challenging. After the conversation, take a moment to check in with yourself. If the discussion brought up difficult feelings, consider reaching out to a trusted colleague, manager, or support service.

Talking about mental health can be daunting, but simply starting the conversation can make a world of difference. By approaching discussions with empathy, respect, and an open mind, you can help create a workplace where everyone feels supported.